Today. Today is the day we've been dreading. It's kind of weird. We are the only ones who even seem to remember, and that makes me sad. I get it - of course. In fact in some ways I feel very much the pressure to "move on." - almost like it's not acceptable for me to even mention this today.
Today was our baby's due date.
Baby four should be here.
We shouldn't be turning that bedroom in to a room for Jemma.
We should be neck deep in diapers, and bottles, and figuring out how to have 4 kids.
We should be dog tired.
Instead we are left with wondering if you are a girl or a boy?
What name would we have settled on?
Should we try again or are we finished?
Baby four, I miss you every day. I am painfully aware of your absence.
Life has moved on, but we think of you often.
We love you.